How many stickers do I earn for this?

As a sleep-deprived parent, I've made my share of mistakes. Lapses in judgment. Delayed responses due to fuzzy-headedness. But once in a while, I manage some proud moments of on-the-spot thinking. Two recent examples:

I was trying to introduce Shmooie to the idea of buttoning his own clothes. Shmoo is not a do-it-himself kind of guy and he was resisting. So I made up a story that the buttons were little mice who wanted to run into their holes. (We've been reading The Dark at the Top of the Stairs at least daily - so mice are a current fascination for da Shmoo.) The mouse storyline intrigued him and he made several attempts.

Another brilliant moment was when I was encouraging Shmooie to use the potty before we left daycare. Someone had just cleaned the toilets, so the water was blue. Shmoo hesitated (unfamiliar situation = scary), until I said "Hey Shmoo - the water is blue and your pee is yellow, so what color will it become when you go potty?"  Oh the joy of a science experiment involving the bathroom! He knew the answer, and made it so.

Yesss!

I guess what this tells me is that the trick to parenting is finding successful ways to manipulate your children. I'd love to hear yours.

Comments

[Bearina]

What's truly tricky - devious methods that work with one child don't always motivate the next! Even when nature and nurture match.

You already know about "candy juice" (medicine).

There's the flashlight bedtime "monster zapper" - a Grandma classic. We used a hippo flashlight and the villains were elves (cute and amusing in stories, but very disturbing, upon reflection, that they might come into one's room at night.)

A great trick from a friend that might work for the Shmoo set: When pressed with questions like "when can I do this?" (eat chocolate eclairs) or "when are we going to do that"(go on a Disney cruise) just say, decisively, "On Tuesday." To someone that lives purely in the present tense that seems positive (they didn't say no!) and definitive (well, I know Tuesday is indeed a day of the week, so hey, it's on the calendar. I can relax. Excellent!)

Turkish bazaar: One negotiating tactic Mom and Dad used on us (or was it just me? hmmm) was to say "How late do you think your bedtime should be?" or "How much do you think your allowance should be?" Kids will usually self-regulate and present a lower opening bid than you might expect. Then you have to make a big show about thinking about it before you agree. It sucked having parents trained in psychology.

I hope my kids aren't reading these comments!

[LetterB]

It's all about the reverse psychology these days. If I want Lowell to do something and he resists I make a game out of it and tell him that under no circumstances is he to do that thing. Then when he does it I make a huge, clowny show of being angry. He loves the whole routine and lets him be "bad" in a safe way that he controls. It's really saving us both a lot of heartache these days.